NO SOONER do I post a piece mentioning the shortage of literature from Big Ollie’s lot than one turns up on the doormat.

A pretty rum offering it is too. On the front there are no less than five photographs of Little Dave Cameron. Stuck on the back is a single shot our very own Big Ollie wearing an apron and serving behind a grocer’s counter. I knew that the expenses troubles have come as a bit of blow to some of our legislators but I had no idea that he is so strapped for cash that he has taken a part-time job. He’ll be delivering the bacon by bicycle next.

Anyway none of us can cast a vote for Little Dave ‘hog-the-limelight’ Cameron next week, he is standing in Witney in Oxfordshire. Those wishing to see a boy in blue returned will be sticking their crosses against the box for Big Ollie ‘will-that-be-all-sir?’ Letwin.

None of the other parties have a photo of their leader on them. Modesty perhaps? In some cases probably wisdom. Susan Greene, appropriately enough, the Green Party candidate, does manage to get a shot of her bike in though and very practical it looks. She is standing, amongst other things, on the principle that Sherborne needs more allotments. Laudable enough but does it exactly catch the present mood of the nation?

Smiler Chisholm opts for the smallest illustration of the lot although his left lapel is adorned by a rosette bearing the £ symbol; is he already seeing the dosh in his mind’s eye and working out just how much he can claim in train fares to Westminster? Nice try Smiler but a bit premature I feel.

The Doc from Dorchester has a whopper on the front of his, photograph that is. At least he is managing a half-hearted and rather enigmatic grin. What else could he do in the present circumstances?

Then there’s everybody’s favourite auntie, Sue Farrant of the Liberal lot. There are no less than 13 pictures of her on her leaflet. Many show her with a gathering of local people, often Lib Dem councillors. Even the mayor of Bridport managed to get in on the act and, no, he doesn’t appear to be standing on an empty beer crate this time

So judging by the picture count it’s Clogger Cleggy’s lass and her cohorts to win with Little Dave Cameron’s ego coming second. Let’s see what actually happens on the day. Thankfully it’s only a week away.

Editor’s Note: Candidates standing for West Dorset in the 2010 General Election campaign are Dr Oliver Letwin (Conservative), Dr Sue Farrant (Liberal Democrat), Dr Steve Bick (Labour), Oliver Chisholm (UKIP) and Susan Greene (Green).